Smoking and squash
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I was out on my smoke break when a large car pulled up next to me.
Not very many people call me butternut squash. At least, not since high school.
"What?" I said.
"Would you like some butternut squash?"
I remembered hearing about this on the news. There is this scam currently in Austin where men drive around in cars, selling butternut squash out of their trunk. But, I couldn't remember what the scam part of it was.
"Well, I don't know. I mean, I have a lot of produce at home."
This was not far from the truth. I had butternut squash at home. I had yellow squash, too. And apples and oranges.
"Listen, I'm trying to move this trunk of squash. You seem like a nice enough guy. Do you want some?"
So, I took some squash and that night made soup. Then there was a knock at the door.
I looked through the peephole and saw the same man who sold me the squash. He must have put a tracking device in them!
I grabbed a large stick, and began to beat him over the head. Repeatedly I struck him, and with his final breath he asked, "I just wanted to know if you liked the squash."
I guess I shouldn't be so quick to jump to conclusions.
Dakota Smith didn't want to be left in charge.